


it's fine and dandy, grief

by Atlasfreak



Series: SBI/Somnia Ranch AU [2]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Farm/Ranch, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Animal Death, Clay | Dream & Technoblade Friendship (Video Blogging RPF), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Good Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Hurt/Comfort, Mentioned TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Older Sibling Wilbur Soot, Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Sad Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Sleepy Bois Inc as Family, Sleepy Boys, Sleepy Boys Inc - Freeform, Technoblade Needs a Hug (Video Blogging RPF), Technoblade is Bad at Feelings (Video Blogging RPF), Technoblade-centric (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot and Technoblade and TommyInnit are Siblings, Wilbur Soot and Technoblade are Siblings, alternative title; techno's cow dies, and it bites him in the ass., ethan's sbi ranch au, i hate tagging i hate it it sucks its bad, sbi, techno suppresses his emotions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-05
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-19 00:48:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,936
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29866617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Atlasfreak/pseuds/Atlasfreak
Summary: Four cattle get sick. Four cattle die. Techno blames himself for the death of his brother's cow Harvey and he buries his feelings over his own diseased and deceased cow deep down to where it will never ever backfire ever.It backfires.[RANCH AU]
Relationships: Clay | Dream & Ranboo (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo & Technoblade, Technoblade & Phil Watson, Technoblade & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot & Technoblade, Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson
Series: SBI/Somnia Ranch AU [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2167488
Comments: 18
Kudos: 143





	it's fine and dandy, grief

**Author's Note:**

> this fic isn't from the ranch au channel on lillian_nator's discord surprisngly, so it's completely new and cool despite us having talked loosely about the scenario before
> 
> pog

Techno is fine.

He's fine, he's fine. It's not a big deal.

His pet is dead at his feet.

But no, no, it's not a big deal. Not a big deal at all.

When.. when they first got cattle, they- they got three. And there's only two left. They - the Somnia children - all picked one, and their papa taught them how to care for them. Tommy got Betty, a sweet, fiesty cow, the mother of his beloved pets, Henry and Harvey and Harold. Wilbur got Skits, a "chad bull" he says, one of the only bulls on their ranch.

Techno got Bob - such a gentle cow for such a- a Technoblade person.

And she's dead. She's gone.

But Techno's fine. There are more important matters to deal with.

Harvey's sick, too. She's sick with the same disease that took a mother cow and her calf and the same disease that took Bob.

And Techno can help, he's the only one. He's a veterinarian - he can save Harvey, can't he?

So it's fine.

He holds his cow close, he buries his head in her fur. He does what Technoblade should never do, and he does it quietly, and nobody sees him; they don't see the great Blood God cry because it's fine and he has to help his brother.

So he does.

He _tries._

And two days later, he slides the barn door closed and Tommy is already waiting there and Tommy looks at him with the barest shred of hope in his eyes and Techno has to stomp on it.

"Is Harvey-"

"I'm sorry, Tomcat."

It hurts to watch. It would hurt just seeing his brother sob and hug his poor dead cow, but it cuts through the wound he had decided wasn't important enough to stitch up. He knows exactly what Tommy is feeling it makes the pain burn so, so deep.

His family doesn't see him bleeding out. Because it's fine.

He feels the pain of failing Tommy and Harvey tearing his guts apart and he buries his own grief under gallons of guilt. He doesn't want the grief, it's too cold. He wants the burning guilt, the fire scorching him to cinders from the inside out, he wants to hide the ice freezing his limbs to the ground and he wants the smoke to cloud his head.

Techno does what he always does when he finds a corpse and he gets his chemicals; Tommy wants Harvey's skull. It's so unlike him, but with wet eyes like that, Techno would have to be heartless to say no.

Maybe he _is_ heartless. Because he looks at the corpse of his pet, his sweet cow - a cow he raised from a calf to an early death - and he says it's fine.

So he macerates the skulls. Plural, of course. Harvey, for Tommy. Tommy will put it over his cow vinyl by his window - a disc of a song he doesn't know, where he takes a worn silver sharpie and he writes the names of every cow or bull that goes.

And Harvey just left.

Techno watches him write her name with shaky hands.

It's fine.

And for him, he will keep Bob's skull. He'll put it on his wall, too, and he'll stick fake flowers in and around it. And he won't cry when he slips in the last stem and he won't cry when he goes to comfort Tommy.

Because what's there to cry about? It's fine.

Ranboo will notice. He always does. He'll give a little plush to Techno, just like he always does, and he'll smile and it'll be a cow. It won't be a pig. It'll be a _cow._ And Techno won't cry because it's fine.

...and if he does cry, Ranboo won't tell anyone.

Dream will notice. He'll challenge Techno to so many things, it'll be stupid. Any contest under the sun, Dream challenges Technoblade to - whether it's a horseback race or who can make the better sandwich, Dream will bury Techno's grief under competition. And Techno will let him, and Techno will mumble "Thank you" when Dream goes home for the day.

Techno will sit with Tommy by Harvey's grave and he will help Phil check up on all their cows and make sure nobody else will die and cut him apart again because the guilt burns, it burns too, too hot, he couldn't save his brother's pet, what use is a vet who can't save one stupid cow?

And oh - oh, he will help Wilbur collect flowers. He will sit with his brother in the garden they share and he'll help him gather the blooms to refresh the ones at their cemetery on top of the hill. They'll wrap them neat in bouquets and they'll lay them on the graves and tuck the loose stems behind the stone, pretty as the sunrise. And Techno will wander away to put a ribbon wrapped bunch of chrysanthemums on a stone marked _Bob._

It's a stupid name. He knew it when he picked it and he knows it now. But he misses her.

It's not fine.

Oh, god, it's not fine at all.

His sweet girl is gone. His cow, the cow who would butt her head into his chest when she wanted pets and the cow that didn't like to eat potatoes and the cow that had the widest eyes and his _cow_ is _dead._

And it's only weeks after her death that Techno feels it.

He fights it, but he's weak, he's too weak. A month of trying to forget it and ignore it and now he's buried under blankets and he can't get himself to move or eat or drink or do anything but blink and breathe.

And finally, his brothers see it. His father sees it. Everyone does. Everyone sees it.

When a king falls, his subjects can hear him hit the ground.

He hid it best he could - from himself and from the others- but he slips and then he tumbles and now the king has fallen and now the king is dead.

He's not dead, but he might as well be. He's hidden himself from his family and his friends, tucked away in the dark of his room as if shadows could wrap him up and take him away.

He watches his clock. He watches time pass, and he doesn't feel it but he feels too much of it and another minute passes and another hour passes and he hasn't moved.

Techno doesn't let Dream in, doesn't let Ranboo in. He locks himself alone in his room, totally and fully alone, and he doesn't react to the knocking or the calls or the pleading.

(When Phil wakes up and he sees Blood God - Techno's beloved runt of a cat, Piglet - scratching at Techno's door, he knows something is horribly, horribly wrong. And Riptide, Techno's terrier dog, is in the kitchen, laying in his bed and waiting for Techno to come give him table scraps. Something is so very wrong.)

Techno doesn't come and with every hour that passes, Philza gets so much more worried.

When he knocks, Techno doesn't let him in. When he calls, "Bay, I have Piglet! She's tearin' your door apart, can I let her in?" Techno doesn't open the door, not even a crack. He doesn't react. At all.

For three days, it's radio silence. Techno doesn't even leave for food.

Phil leaves a plate by his door.

It's still there, untouched, in the morning.

He's worried out of his mind.

And he finds Ranboo sitting against Techno's door, talking at him. It's pitiful, watching Ranboo hold a conversation with the empty air. Trying his hardest to keep his friend company. His voice is cheerful yet his eyes are stormy and dark. Phil catches Dream trying to get in through Techno's window, but he's unsuccessful. Dream falls to the ground and angrily brushes off his hoodie, glaring at the window like it personally hurt him. Wilbur has his hand on the doorknob, quietly telling Techno that he'll do his chores for him that day, asking to be let in. He plays music for his brother, and Tommy slips letters under the door, and yet nothing. Nothing from the pink haired boy, not even a cough.

Nobody can get to him. They can hear his walkie talkie through his door and yet he's never spoken into it. They can't get to him.

They don't understand. What's wrong with Technoblade? He's there, he's definitely in there - ("Tetsy, Papa's really scared. You're in there, right? You're okay? Can you say something please? Techa?" "..hi, Wilbur." "Thank you. Thank you. Your, um- your voice sounds awful." ".." "Ok. Bye, T- bye, Technoblade.") - but he won't come out.

And then Ranboo and Dream are talking. _They're talking to each other._ Ranboo is scared of Dream, they don't _talk._ Yet they're there, sitting together at the kitchen table.

Phil flicks the lights on. "Dream? Ran?"

"Hi, Philza," Ranboo waves politely. Dream tilts his head - the smile on his mask makes him look like the villain in a horror film.

"What're you guys... doing?"

"Chatting," Ranboo places his head on his folded hands. "We're chatting."

"..it's 2 AM. Why aren't you at home?" Phil moves to pour himself a cup of water.

Dream slips his mask up off his face and Phil almost drops his glass. Dream raises an eyebrow, staring.

"We're worried about Techno," he says after a moment of silence. "It's pretty bad."

Ranboo nods. "I miss my friend."

"Practically brother, honestly," Dream huffs.

"Put your mask back on, son," Phil interrupts. "I feel like I'm not meant to see that."

Dream shakes his head and places his mask on the table. Ranboo snorts.

"Here, Phil, sit with us. We'll fill you in on what we're on about."

And so Phil sits. He sits for hours, talking and taking in and he goes to sleep for only a blink that night and he's tired but he understands.

He knocks. Techno doesn't answer, of course he doesn't answer. Phil leans into the door.

"Technoblade? Come out, come with me. You're not in trouble, you're not required to talk at all, at _all._ I wanna show you something. Please?"

And the door opens and Phil's heart breaks.

He looks like death. His eyes are blank and cold and wet, his hair is sticking up and it needs to be redyed- the brown roots seep into the pink that should be so bright but falls so short, so dull and lifeless. He's wearing the same pajamas he went to be in four nights ago. He stumbles around like he's dead on his feet and he reacts so slowly.

He doesn't speak. It'll be several days yet before he even tries.

And Phil takes him by the hand and they eat ice cream with Bob's grave.

It's morbid, but it's peaceful. Techno has a little cup of plain vanilla and he keeps pausing and staring at the little flower-covered rock and he cries and Phil hates having to remember that his son cries silently save for hiccups.

They say nothing. They eat their treats together and then Phil lets Techno go back to his room.

That night he accepts the food left at his door.

Sometimes gods can fall from the skies and sometimes kings question the crown on their head and sometimes Technoblade is weak and sad.

But the gods come back to the clouds and the kings grab their scepters and Techno recovers.

With time, ice will melt. And with time, it freezes again.

Techno puts his crown back on.

**Author's Note:**

> remember to leave kudos and comments because they fuel my egotistical endeavors


End file.
